Why shouldnt I?
Guess it has been a good beginning to the New year.
Ok. First, Daddy is much better. The family patriarch fell sick, and the family rallied around him. Remember that I had just had that text from my sister that she wouldn't attend our partnership anniversary because we were living a sin? That made me sore.
But, it was not to last for long, in the haze when the family patriarch suddenly reminds us all that he is mortal. In a way, he holds us together, though he is a contentious old man, old world, who has a very interesting, conservative, but very pragmatic view of the world. He rolls with the blows. Typical old world self sufficiency and resiliency, he insisted to be back at work the day after he was out of hospital. Unfortunately, after the scare, his kids were not ready to be convinced that the old man was ok. So, investigations continue....
And, yes, it is very expensive to be sick.
But, with help, we weathered that huddle. No insurance, but, traditionally, a large family is all the insurance that a patriarch needs.
He is fine, for now, though the final verdict is yet to be delivered.
But, most important is the fact that we are through the celebrations.
It is matter of fact that celebrations and parties bewilder me. I am so not into them that I am bewildered by the energy that goes into what I think is a non-entity. But, it is just me being obtuse. They do have their use, parties, celebrations.
But, the cost!!!!!! Financial, emotional, time spent, etc... Why don't we do without them?
Ok, quitting the bitching. It was a nice party.
Our tenth anniversary. My partner (maybe should start calling him husband, I mean, it is way beyond simple 'partnership') did everything. Getting the money, arranging things, getting venue, arranging it, collecting things that were supposed to be there and were not.... The last two weeks I was resigned to waking in the middle of the night with him suddenly remembering a detail that was undone. And, I would have to patiently remind him that there was nothing that he could do at three in the morning....!
Last minute scares. The venue was nearly lost. Reason, the host got to know that the news of the party was running through the kuchu community like wildfire. People wanted to attend. Were not averse to phoning around to ask for the invitation. Strict security concerns. Ours and our host meant it could not be other than a small event, invitation only. Yes of course, we do not want to ignite another media event of a 'gay wedding'. It becomes kind of tiresome. Recent court ruling not withstanding. I do know that we are a source of staple for the media.... didnt end with the court ruling!
It was beautiful.
He put me in a kanzu and jacket. Something which I so rarely do it is amazing. Today, I reminded him that it was only the second time that he has seen me in one.
But, this being his day, he bought the material himself, special one... , not the usual plain un-ardoned white. Talk about special.
He designed how it should be done... including enough features to make it unique. One kanzu for me, and one for himself. And, he made sure the poor tailor delivered on time. Selected hats. Hats, for goodness' sake! I must say I felt kind of funny putting on mine. Was told it was cool, but, to my head, it was kinda hot....
Guests came the usual time, fashionably late. But, the camaraderie, the good spirits, the flowing food and alcohol, by the time the cake was cut, it was a riot.
But, best of all, two of my brothers decided to attend.
Ha. Big deal. Very big deal.
My sister had refused. It would have been a sin, or she would be condoning a sin. I was downcast. I thought of asking my mom. But, I was simply not ready to face rejection from her. Fact is, I had thought that my sis would inform her, and she would demand to be there. So, when my sis didnt, I didnt dare....! Coward, but, well, preserving the status quo for another day.
Imagine my suprise when, seated at the high table, I saw my brothers walk in.
I had informed one, the one who used to stay with us. He is semi-independent now. Studying, and looking out to the world with one foot towards full independence. Last year, he was invited. Declined, with an excuse. Which I didnt stop myself from informing him, hurt me. Guilted him, of course.
This time, I told him. He listened. Asked for directions to the event.
I directed him to my lover, who gave them to him. And then the suprise. He would ask another of my brothers to attend, if we didnt mind....
Of course we didnt. And, he promised to tell him.
Imagine my suprise when they both walked into the event.
We took the opportunity to introduce them, of course. They got the place of honour, and, silly boys, drunk themselves almost to a high state of hilarity.
Near ten, when the party was winding up, we insisted on someone seeing them home safely.
Gosh, what a gift to us! Hopefully, they will spread the word that kuchus don't eat people. Seems a major concern amongst Ugandans....
I must confess it was more than we expected. Though I was a bit shy kissing my man infront of them, after the cake was cut....! But, it was still very much something we enjoyed, me and my man.
Today we are resting. Cannot do nothing but that. The day is nice, overcast, and we are feeling chipper. But, the bodies have to be rested.
Yes. I am feeling very, very good.