Everywhere I look, all around me;
my world looks sick,
a huge, bleeding, oozing, weeping wound.
Try, let the healing love leak
from you, from me, where I am, where you are.
Do not, underestimate, your power dude-
you are a healing presence;
let the power your love leach
a little at a time, all round you, where you are.
You’ll be healed and
our world will be a better place
for the smile on your face;
You are a healing presence.
©GayUganda 14 Sept. 08
In
it’s the fresh beauty of spring
and golden heat of summer
all through the year;
knowing not the harshness of winter,
nor its great gray strangeness
but touching all the rainbow shades
of sunny lovely weather.
©GayUganda 11 September 2008
Who is to blame for Homosexuality?
When one raises the topic of homosexuality, the first fingers are pointed at schools. People then go on to list names of various culprit schools, most
At the mention of the name Julie Victor Mukasa and other prominent proud homosexuals, the first thing that runs through an ordinary Ugandan's mind is, from which schools did these rare bold species study? But I believe the question should rather be: from which-families do these species come?
Time and again, the blame for homosexuality is being put on schools. But to say schools alone are entirely responsible for this disastrous behavior is failing to understand the underlying causes of this fast spreading moral decadence.
While apportioning the blame, the biggest goes to parents.
I know parents are always the first to point fingers at schools but have you played your part? Parents have failed to. give their children parental guidance; sex education and enough love and care; they haven't taught their children various virtues patience, contentment and selflessness. This exposes children to wrong sex education from uncensored movies that you have not cared to sieve. If you didn't know, teens are emulating what they see in those movies.
The children, especially teenagers who have a lot of demands, go in for homosexuality because they have been promised money and sponsorship to universities abroad.
Parents deny their children a chance to interact with the opposite sex thinking it is bad
For heavens sake, teachers have their own families and they are dealing with a large number of students. How can they handle each child at a personal level? It is these loopholes that are creating space for this evil to spread in schools. When a homosexual is expelled, parents complain claiming that expulsion is not the solution to the problem.
But when a homosexual student is retained by the school on condition that he/she will
I only meant to open our eyes to avoid the business of painting fingers at schools; there are greater causes. Pointing fingers does not solve the problem; let's look for solutions to eradicate this fast spreading moral disaster that is spreading thrice as fast as the school fires. Together, we shall fight if there is hope for the teenagers, a brighter future and a homosexual free environment.
Homosexuality
[Some personal opinions from students?]
PATRICIA AJUMA, S4, STELLA MARIS COLLEGE NSUBE
Homosexuality is more rampant in boys' schools. Many boys are sexually active so they begin admiring each other and practicing these weird tendencies.
I do not know about the boys but girls involved in lesbianism are too much into each other. They call each other sweetheart and carry for each other water to the bathroom. Personally I believe expulsion is not enough. These people need to be counseled by professionals
JONATHAN WANDERA, S.6, KIIRA COLLEGE BUTIKI
I have read about homosexuality in the press and I have heard of massive expulsions of homosexuals from many schools.
I think it is more common in single sex schools because they do not interact with the opposite sex. It is worse in boys' schools because boys are easily influenced by many things. Boys in higher classes usually take advantage of younger ones in lower classes and force them into homosexuality.
Schools should do more in educating students about the dangers of homosexuality. Parents should be involved more in their children’s lives ,so they guide them. Imprisonment does not change or help matters. Counseling does.
PETER PARKER RANCHEZY OS-COL,19
WHOEVER believes that homosexuality does not occur in schools is like the proverbial ostrich which buries its head in the sand.
A friend told me he used to practice homosexuality at their school until he developed complications down there. I did not believe him because I did not expect a friend to be homosexual. He told me it was because of money given to him by his ‘sponsor’, a white guy. I think school authorities should be very strict when it comes to homosexuality because it is a movement. Teachers and health officials should examine both boys and girls suspected of this act, and when evidence is got, they should be handed over to the Police. Such strong meassuere will deter many from practicing it.
SANDRA ASIZU S4, ST JOSEPH’S GIRLS NSAMBYA
Friends from other schools tell me of girls who have been expelled from their schools because thy are suspected of lesbianism. I think the best way of handling this is by counseling the girls other than expulsion. Counselling them about the dangers of homosexuality is enough to deter many from it. I do not buy the argument the people are born homosexuals. God was not foolish to create man and woman. School authorities should get very serious with the so called…
HALID AKANKWANSA,
I believe teachers know about homosexuality but keep quiet because they want to protect the reputation of their schools.
The onus is on the government. School inspectors should inspect single sex schools. To stop this habit from taking root in schools, I think it should be a school policy for single sex schools to kill the monotony. Socials should be held ever weekend so girls can interact with boys.
FELIX MUKUNZI,
I will say homosexuality exists in schools number of my friends from other schools have testified to it. They say that the homosexuals behave. walk (in a certain way. gug additions!)
MARY NAJJUMA sS3,
A Rwandese guy in my former school was a homosexual. Of course it was known in the student’s circles and boys in his dormitory knew that he was gay but none of them reported him to the school authorities. He was girlish in everything he did, for instance he liked hugging boys tenderly.
I think silence has favored homosexuality. I think the more that students chose to keep quiet about it fuels its spread. Open discourses are better than shunning the culprits because they never change. Maybe though talk, they will realize that they are damaging their bodies.
HOMOSEXUALS ARE MADE, NOT BORN
BY BEN OKIROR
ALRIGHT, there has been all this yapping and debating that homosexuality is genetic but counselors say it is as a result of our environment - the buddies we chill and hang with, our childhood, among mob other such things.
Joseph Musaalo, a counseling psychologist at Uganda Christian I University, Mukono, says several researchers have also concluded that homosexuals are not born. He said babes and dudes who become homosexuals suffered sexual abuse while they were still kidos.
"When one has been abused, they tend to engage in same sex relationships out of anger," he said but also pointed out that other causes could be peer pressure and erosion of family values.
Another counselor, Florence Oduman of Alfa Counselling Centre, Ntinda, also agreed that homosexuality is just introduced to a teenie and after that, it becomes a habit.
Some teenies, she says, join schools when they are already homos so they recruit others by either using force or dime.
But if you are a homo, you can be helped via counselling and rehabilitation.
Mob spots can offer this counselling and rehabilitation but you can visit Healing Talk Counselling Services at Nakawa, Relate Counselling at
"It's normally a hard habit to break because it becomes an addiction," said Oduman. "However, during counselling, its dangers are exposed and the victim can get helped. It even involves separating such a person from their partner."
Ruth Matoya, a counselling psychologist at Healing Talk Counselling Services and a lecturer at
Stigma is not the only zib that Matoya mentions. There are both physical and psychological dangers. For example, since the human sexual anatomy is designed for male female relationships, bruising can easily occur in the process as well as numerous infections because the bacteria in the anus can be transmitted to other areas.
"The anus is designed to open outwards and if it's forced to open inwards, it can wear out," Matoya said. "The other issue [especially among the boys] is who can accept to be the 'woman' because men are born with an ego and at one time will want to be in a controlling position.
For girls, they will need a masculine touch at one time that none of them can provide in a same sex relationship."
-Because it is a perverted way of looking at things, Mutoya says, homosexual teenies won't be able to be fathers or mothers.
She advises parents to uplift self esteem in their children, especially in adolescence, and give them enough information about sexuality. But, teachers should constantly warn students about the risks of engaging in homosexuality – like easily getting sexually transmitted diseases like HIV/AIDS. She said in every school, homosexuality and lesbianism exists and therefore teachers shouldn't overlook it.
I am home.
Home after a long day. Woke up early to go to work. Friday, and the end of the week. Not a great week, as a matter of fact. But because it is Friday, there is something about that which is infectious. So, work was not that fun.
But it rained, a lot. And the work was busy.
And now I am home. My lover is besides me, bugging me with questions about this and that.
No electricity in the house.
It rained heavily. And when it rains, well, the power goes off, on an unscheduled power cut. The sun has set, in a blaze of orange flames, far to the west. And the darkness of night is invading my world.
I stayed late at work, overtime. Ugandan employers specialize in not paying for overtime, and making sure that workers ‘involuntarily’ donate their time. But, this time, it was not that. A client reminded me that I am human. That me, and him, are human.
I work in an unashamedly commercial company. No freebies. Money talks, and talks well.
He walked in, and asked for me. I was a bit surprised, and maybe I would not have taken him. It was past my allotted time, and I didn’t know him, and … a lot of other things.
Anyway, I saw him.
And we talked. At first, his problem was his problem. Then it became my problem.
Don’t know how that magic came about.
I saw a scared young man. With a huge problem, which he was failing to handle. For some reason, he trusted me enough to tell me, a complete stranger, about it. And we wrestled with the answers. Together.
I have grown up knowing there are no easy answers. And some very tough solutions. Not always what one wants to do. But I have also learnt how contrary we human beings are. Ready to believe the worst of one another. In the searing economic heat of this country, willing to unashamedly take advantage of any who is weaker. And we do, for sheer ‘survival of the fittest’.
Yet through this rough and tumble of everyday living, once in a while one is reminded of the basic humanity of the other person. And can reach out to give a little help, even if it is plain lifting a corner of the load.
It was my immediate supervisor who reminded me that my time was up. And he was surprised that I was still around. I left, with a smile on my heart. I think the guy had got more than he expected.
I didn’t regret the time that I had spent talking to him. Well, it will not be paid for.
But I realized the satisfaction I did get from the simple act of listening to his problem, and finding possible solutions reminded me of my humanity.
I am gay. A militant homosexual. Maybe Ssempa would grace me with the term, a senior homosexual. Guess it is one of those things that pull my strings, the ‘homosexual agenda’ as some so ruthlessly put it.
But I am also a human being, and the plain, rough politics of life make me forget that I am a human being.
Feels good to remember.
GayUganda
Dear God,
You will forgive me. I am not into the habit of prayer. And I do not believe. Well, it is true, I do not believe. So, it might be a little strange that I am praying now. Or, at least writing a prayer.
It has been a long time. The habits do grow stale with no use.
You see, I am a homosexual. We went through that last time I dared to pray.
No. I have not changed my mind. I know I am a homosexual, and, at the moment, I am even convinced that you created me a homosexual. You see, it is kind of hard for me to believe that you would make me one thing, and then demand that I become something else. We did go through this, remember?
Yes, I did come to a conclusion that I could not believe in you.
After all, there seemed to be no way for that to be possible. You will forgive me if something still draws me back to praying. I would blame it on the little alcohol I took today. But I have been thinking about it for some time.
You see, God, my lover is a believer.
He is a man, and I am a man. And he believes in you.
I don’t know why he does, but he does. Maybe it is his faith rubbing off on me. He is a homosexual, and he believes in you as god.
I have many problems with his beliefs, but he still believes. Which is strange, since we have managed to stay together some seven years now. I am proud of that.
Remember the time that I told you that I am homosexual? And what made me conclude that I could not believe in you? Many of the reasons still hold.
It is true that I kind of believe in the god of the new testament. You know, the one that Jesus preached about. A god of love. Fact, I do fear the god of the old testament, so if it was not that there was some hope with Jesus’s god, I would not come to you at all.
A god of love. Is that possible?
But so many of the people who believe in you and call themselves your children, and Christians are very quick to believe in the god of death. No mercy, little love, and all sorts of rules and laws. I know this, even more than the other time. You see, when I say I am a homosexual, they tell me it is impossible for me to be anything like a Christian. Because I must deny that I am a homosexual, something which I know would be a lie. Do I have to live a lie to be a Christian?
Again, we have gone through this before.
But something which irks me, why do Christians hate us homosexuals so much?
Don’t tell me that they do not hate me. I do not have to cite all the instances of their hate of me. I am not a child, and you know, I would not like you to insult the intelligence you gave me, ok? They hate me, and it is galling that they say they ‘hate my sin but love me’. Why do they think…
Ok, maybe I should not blame you for all your people’s beliefs.
I think I am through with the prayer. It will not change what they think. And they will continue hating me, whatever they say.
Oh, I know some don’t, but they are very few. And those who hate us are so many as compared to those who don’t. And they hate them because they love us.
Anyway, I think I will end this prayer here.
Frankly, I am confused. I am not sure that I know what I am praying about. But then, I do not claim to know everything about life. I just know I need to pray. Maybe. Sometimes.
And, you know, I didn’t say I believed in you, just because I prayed. After all, I am a homosexual. Of that I am very sure.
GayUganda
Overcast. Heavy.
The sun above may be very bright; should be. The amount of light filtered through the overcast is a lot. But we see no sun, and the whole sky is a grey white mass, holding back the brilliance, and heat. Below, the air barely stirs. And it is cold, a sharp, challenging cold.
Yet, this is
Yesterday, it was brilliant hot. A calm, clear blue sky with little cloud. A sun, queen of all she touched. Triumphant. And the temperatures could not have been beyond 28C. Now, it is cold; but I am moving around in my shirtsleeves. And shorts. Should be 18C or thereabouts.
The invigorating cold of a shower.
Have had a great night’s sleep. Woke up to the warmth of my lover besides me. And to sex. And more sleep.
A new week, and how well can one welcome it?
Last week went in a whirl. Have been sort of disconnected. Wrapped in the things I have to do, enough to forget much of the world around me. Oh, I know that the Kyabazinga of Busoga died. And I have just discovered to my surprise that he is an elected traditional leader. Not hereditary, as the norm is. [Shows how much I know of our traditions!] So, as he is laid to rest, politicking continues. And the land saga in NSSF is continuing. etc. Life as usual.
Last week I waded into a cyber war. Wholly Ugandan! But it has had me take up a privilege I had acquired sometime ago, which I had left to rot. Blogging on a collective Ugandan blog. Hilarious exchanges.
Apparently, I am too much in your face gay. So what? I am gay, and much as I have been reluctant to emphasize that part of my identity, some would rather have me not talk about it at all. Seems too much of a distraction. So, of course I will continue talking about my being gay. I am what I am. And gay is part of it.
I will wrap myself now in some work. For some time. And then, hopefully, the sun will have dispersed the grey white overcast.
A Beautiful day, a beautiful Sunday to you. And of course the week.
GayUganda
