Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Playing the Victim

Do LGBTI in Uganda play the victim too much?

27th thinks that we do. We are victims. True, but we play it too much. (Now, he is going to ask where exactly he said that.)

But it is something that has been said before, even on this blog.

Kind of a fine line there. The fact that we are victims is acknowledged, with the immediate rejoinder that we play it up.

Do we?

I am not sure that we do.

Is it better for us not to cry? Or to cry back in our closets, alone and frightened, without anyone knowing what is happening? Alone, being gay and alone in a mass of heterosexuals can feel very lonely. Coming out of that closet does feel liberating. In a country like Uganda, one cannot be completely out. Today, I have just had another brush with the risks we take. In office, had taken a peep at the blog. I get out of the room, and a colleague comes in.

He definitely saw what was on the screen.

About 3 years ago, a gay friend of mine made a pass at this colleague, and we ended up at a police station. My friend stayed in police cell for 3 nights, as we arranged for suitable bribes. Fact.

So, this colleague comes into my ‘office’, he saw what was on my screen. He did not mention it. But I have been so ‘out’ that he may know. Or suspect, since that incident. And last year of course. I was not too shy.

Such a thing happens, routinely. And we don’t talk about it.

There is a kuchu friend that was mentioned in the red rug as always in and out of the police cells. He seems to be attracted to straight men only!!!! So he has made friends with some of the officers so that he comes out sooner rather than later. These are things that do not make the newspapers. We do pay off reporters who threaten to expose us. Again, clear eyed fact of life. Risks of being a kuchu in Uganda.

The HIV programme for Kuchus which we have never had, because Ssempa believes that the law should be implemented? That is, the police should arrest us for having sex so that HIV is not spread by gay sex. Again, we shouldn’t cry about that. We should get HIV, and go ahead and get the drugs. After all, they are supposed to be free in Uganda.

Now, I am wondering whether we do cry out enough?

I mean, it seems as if we have suffered too many indignities silently, and when we cry out our detractors say that we are being babies!

Ok.

No more pandering to those.

And I will continue relying on the allies that I can get, where they are, who can aid me. I will not be ashamed to cry out, because I will no longer cry silently. Rather than crying too little, I would rather cry too much. The excess will be accounted for by the times that I did not cry out, and I did suffer indignities in silence.


GayUganda

10 comments:

DeTamble said...

Alright, I see your point. Cry away. I shall never whine about it again! :-)

The 27th Comrade said...

I said it! :o)

Yeah, okay. Cry a bit. It's cool. But not too much, 'kay? Let's leave room for women, physically-disabled people, epileptics, the illiterate, and the like to have some room to cry, as well.

And the poor. They are very oppressed. And the old. And the mentally-ill. And the homosexuals. Oh, wait ... these ones already have blogs. :o)

gayuganda said...

Yes,

that was aimed at the two of you. Glad to see that you have responded, deTamble. Cause I am not going to have any shame whining from now on. You had intimidated me.

As for the revolutionary,
No, I will not remember the others. This is my story, and those others do have bleeding hearts like you to topple governments for them. I will do it for myself.

Hey, by the way, have you responded to the last post by Eshuneutics? You a hamster or not? The judgement is still out there...

gug

Princess said...

"And I will continue relying on the allies that I can get, where they are, who can aid me. I will not be ashamed to cry out, because I will no longer cry silently. Rather than crying too little, I would rather cry too much. The excess will be accounted for by the times that I did not cry out, and I did suffer indignities in silence."

Apt.

gayuganda said...

So's the single word comment

gug

Eshuneutics said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

From: The Fair(y) Justice Party

Now, 27th, darling, my first question: Is that number a vital statistic in centimetres? I couldn't help thinking this when our paths crossed recently. I bet you noticed me...as you notice all the kuchus in taxis. I have to say I was surprised to see you in a taxi as you think it is soooo Capitalist. But now, that isn't my point, 27th, it is this. You really must stop scratching poor old GUG with those finger nails. I know, they are a very nice shade of Green Envy, but it really isn't nice of you. No, darling, it really isn't. But, in your favour, can I also just say that I love it when you talk Marxism. It is just so erotic. "Every man according to his needs". Oh, if only. I could send you my she-male address, but it would have to be coded so no one else got it. You are such a tease. What is a girl to do? This coded love thing is just so mysterious and such a turn on to us homosexuals that adore secret languages. It is you know, such a shame that you won't let us join your revolution for rights. Don't you think that there could be room for camp in your revolutionary camp? We could help you hunt Bush in the jungle or Jungle in the bushes, whatever it is that you do to plot the revolution.We could advise you on how to put on your camouflage shitstick or even wear your Calvin Klein shorts the right way round. No, that would be too American wouldn't it. Not to worry. I see you more as a commando man, personally, darling, anyway. And that takes me back to where I started, 27th. I looked and I thought, please, that is the trouble with these revolutionaries. They keep their rifles in their trousers, which is why they keep shooting themselves in the foot. You know, we could teach you straight boys how to shoot straight!

Eshuneutics said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The 27th Comrade said...

@GUG: No, no! Fight the fight for your friends. I'll do the one for the poor and oppressed, cool? I'm the Commie. You're the gay activist. :o)

"The excess will be accounted for by the times that I did not cry out, and I did suffer indignities in silence."
As Princess already said ... But still. Some of us weren't here when you weren't crying. We'll get pissed, see?

@Eshuneutics: From adversary to ... ? I just think I should sign you up for the revolution. Jeez the Nazarene. You hunted me down this far. We don't have soldiers that good. Well, only me, maybe. Okay, the hedonist blog ... I'll think up an excuse and then get back to you. As it is, some comment in here has shocked me already, I've even lost my fighting spirit. A bit of a an "Et tu Brutus? Then Ceasar fall." moment.

@Anonymous (Fair(y) Justice Party): Okay, I'm a bit thrown by that.
I'm shocked, even scared. Um ... I don't even know how to reply. I've hung on this sentence for like minutes. That never happens. Usually, I type like a demon-posessed demon. But now ... And yet if I ignore it, I'll feel stupid. GUG pointed me here to take the challenge.
If you keep calling me them endearments, I'm going to call my legion of girls. The winner takes me, cool? Okay. And no, the number is not in centimetres. That would be an under-statement. I dare not deduct from that which God has thus appointed. I think I've bragged more on by blog about the length-and-girth issues. :o) I hope I'm doing well in masking my shock. At some point, I'll be able to write back to such a comment with an equally pointed comment, but at the moment it still throws me. A bit.
And I doubt GUG wrote this. This doesn't look like GUG's grammar. Yet he is the only one I know who says "Kuchus", so it may yet be GUG. Also, GUG is the only one here who knows what I look like, so ... GUG, did you write this? Yet I think GUG wouldn't. He's too wrapped, literally, in his lover to write this. Maybe.
"I bet you noticed me...as you notice all the kuchus in taxis."
Not really. I said that to Eshuneutics, that I sit next to gays in taxis and at work and in pubs while he was dancing on streets in the West. The point was that I was closer to the Ugandan gays than the Westerners who pretend they care more for them.
I do take taxis, yeah. Better than an air-conditioned palace-on-wheels, isn't it? For a Communist, I mean.
My nails ... Um, yeah, the shade is a bit conspicuous. I don't really "scratch" at GUG. More like a bunch of things that his community, and him (by extension) usually do. And no, not his (their) being gay.
You can, by all means, fight for rights. Yours, other people's, everyone. Fight! :o) And if you'll help hunt Bush down, then we are already comrades! :o) It's all I'm doing these days: fighting for rights.
Okay. There. I hope I sustained myself long enough to write back a response. And I don't have a clue who this is, so you know ... I'm really a bit non-calm. (Scared is just not for revolutionaries.) Thanks for the comment.

gayuganda said...

27th,

this does you honour. The blistering banter is replaced with hesistancy. Not quite sure that you want to answer, not daring not to answer, a bit out of your depth!

Sounds good to me.

No, regretfully, I did not write that. Dont know who did, but you know, many do read this blog and dare not leave their names. Something to do with my 'theme' as you so aptly put it.

You have been singed, and, sorry to say, I am rolling in laughter. Good experience, no?

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