Saturday, March 1, 2008

A Gay Ugandan and Religion 2

Now, to the reason for my change of mind.

It is Lent. You know, Christian season for fasting and repentance and things like that. I usually know it because my lover tells me. He is into religion. I am not into it. My only concern is that he cannot (so we do not) eat meats on Friday during Lent. That is the extent of my observation of the season. Of course I do not go work on Easter. Stay in bed and sleep.

He is Catholic, and he does believe.

But he is also gay and Ugandan.

Last night he told me that he had got a priest that he could talk to. I listened, wondering why he was telling me.

Then he told me that he was going to talk to the priest about his sexuality. And he was asking me for permission.

I asked him why he thinks he has to ask me for permission. A shrug was the response.

I have not had a ‘catholic’ upbringing. He has. I know the issues of ‘confession’ and ‘counselling’. Frankly, they sound weird to me. And uncomfortable.

A few years back, my lover told me he wanted to go for confession. Telling a priest about us. I was well and truly horrified. Very uncomfortable. I campaigned for him not to, and he did not.

But he has a need for it.

We do not discuss religion. Ago, I was a deep sceptic, and hostile. That rubbed off onto him. But I cannot deny him his right to faith, and his right to believe. We do not talk about religion, but many are the times he used to leave me in bed to go to Mass. And he does want his connection, his spirituality.

I may not believe, but I do believe in his right to faith.

Unfortunately, in Uganda, the religions do not believe in the kuchus right to faith, any faith. Being homosexual and a believer is mutually exclusive in the mind of most Ugandans. The Mufti, leader of Moslems believes that we should be exiled and left to die on an island. The Catholic and Anglican leaders are in the ‘Rainbow Coalition against Homosexuality’. A group purposely formed to deny us of any rights, or ‘normalisation of homosexuality’ as Pastor Ssempa puts it.

I have made my peace with that, to my content. He has not. He believes, and believes deeply.

So, he has made an appointment, after years of putting it off. He is going to talk to a priest about his sexuality. Tell him that he is gay, and that he is living with a man.

Do I have a reason to be worried?

Sincerely, I do not know. I cannot understand the need. Though I accept that he wants to.

Told him that if he is counselled to break up with me, I will visit the priest with an axe and the intent to use it. He tells me not to worry.

But as he so frequently tells me, only one who is not concerned puts aside concern. So, I am –anxiously waiting for the results of the appointment with the priest.



spiralx said...

There's a pretty good summary of the real Catholic position (not what the ignorant fundamentalists say) here:

Aftert hat, you can move to the Catholics who acept homosexuality here:

Go, Catholic Gay Pride! Yay!

gayuganda said...

Thanks Spiralx


DeTamble said...

rainbow coalition against? Is that a joke? Which idiot chose that for a name? the rainbow is the gay flag. the rainbow isn't against it's for! silly coalition.

spiralx said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
spiralx said...

detamble, the rainbow has been a symbol of hope and renewal for as long as... well, WAY back beyond when Noah spotted one, just off the boat! So was the swastika - an ancient Aryan (Indian) symbol of light.

We know how Hitler perverted the swastika. And watching the fundamentalists do the same with "rainbow" is, as you say, very silly. Not intelligent at all. But - perversely clever, as Hitler was.

History of 'our' flag, here!

gug - I know, I know... you aren't thrilled about any of it... but if your other half wants to try and fit these two bits of his personal jigsaw together, then really, all you can do is try to stand by him?

("Under-standing" - standing under, in this case, supporting and lifting). His journey can be, in a sense, yours as well, if you let it. (Probably going to be, anyway, one way or another!).

Fabio said...

I read your blog in Spain. My english is little and poor but i want say u, I am here, i want to help and chular with you in this reason.
With affection and solidarity a great embrace

gayuganda said...

Hi Spiralx, Stand by him I will. I have. We've been through a lot together.

Welcome and thanks, Fabio.


DeTamble said...

@spiralx Hitler, I don't like what he did exactly but you gotta admit he sure was a clever cookie, persevering too. I wonder what his art would have been like.

That's quite a nice history and acid too. I am definitely a fan of hallucinogenics. That Rainbow Coalition is disgusting! How dare they call themselves that!! Those smarmy little bastards need to be taken down! If only there was some way to turn them all gay, that'd fuck with their heads!

I like your comments spiralx, they be good and thought provoking!

deo said...

you need serous prayers brother.are you not ashamed of your self?let the animals teach you who to relate with other wise you need help.dont even call your self a ugandan.shame upon you.ANGRY OJANKS WROTE

gayuganda said...

hi Brother Deo,

no thanks, for the prayers.

I will affirm, I am gay, I am Ugandan. And what you are saying will not make me go and shrink away in terror. At least now. Sorry for you!

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