A Long post to Wind Up the Year 2009

It is the very last day of the year.

Must say the day is cool. Cold. I don’t remember an end of year with so much rain. Overcast, grey skies, cool in Uganda means 16C. Told you this is a beautiful country, with beautiful weather. I know, some people are suffering with freezing weather. And, they would believe this is summer if it was this hot….!

[Cheeky grin]. I love this country. For its good weather, its beauty, for all the pleasures of being, even when it is tough. I know, many people don’t understand something like that. Being content, feeling good when I should feel bad. Why do I?

Life is a dream. One day, we shall wake up. For the moment, let me dream on.

Yesterday was a day of thought. Not about any new year resolutions. Don’t usually do those. But, the red rug article.

I noticed a few things, like the change of focus from ‘foreign promoters’, to in-house promoters. Of a sudden, we promoters of homosexuality have become rich, ‘city tycoons’…. Able to fund trips abroad, and support the cause in Uganda with our monies. We are rich, we are strong, we are ugly. That is the message from the Ssempa anti-gays.

I have a niggling thought that this blog is a thorn in their side. That, that little fact makes me love to continue. Dude, I love being the child pointing out that nakedness of the Emperor…! [Hans Christian Andersen; The Emperor's New Clothes]

I have not yet received the 20Million US Dollars from Homosexual International. I even went to my bank manager to make sure that the money was really not on my account. I will have to go to Minister Nsaba-Buturo. He was in on the secret….

I am given to understand that Bishop Ssenyonjo of Integrity Uganda has affirmed not receiving that money. Maybe SMUG received it and is holding out on us? I need to ask the guys at SMUG…!

But, I have a better idea. We have some rich ‘city tycoons’ that are funding Homosexual Uganda as we await monies from ‘Homosexual International’. You saw the article, didn’t you? It is in the red rug, and, I had to put it here. Apparently, there are some very rich guys who can tide me over. Of course it will be a loan (but most likely they will not feel the pinch). Who are these rich guys?

They are all in the red rug article. Let me see-

There is an organization called LGBT (if you don’t know that, it’s the acronym for this huge international funding organization Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender). I swear, I am not lying. These guys have money. Lots and lots of money. But, if I understood well the article, they are some of the people who might have sent the 20Million that I am waiting for. The Swedes, well, they have to first pass the Anti-Homosexual Bill in parliament, then the Swedes will cut off aid, and, presumably line our pockets. [Sigh, the new year plans to be extremely rich! The bill will become law. You watch this space]

But, there are some rich local folks that I can rely on. They should be willing to tide me over. In the name of homosexual international cause, of course. And, when the money comes, of course I will refund them.

The Manager with Bata, and, what about the rich, high profile doctor? That one surely? Shelling out a few miserly shillings to tide over poor gug. (Some people say I should be able to migrate from Google’s blogspot, with all that backing…!). There is also the rich city ‘image’? The guy from a rich communication company. Should be a top echelon officer that. He funded a trip to Nairobi.

I am pretty sure God and Kar should be able to help.

Except that I thought god was supposedly in heaven?

ha ha ha ha!

Sincerely, some of this stuff should be put in a thriller. Set in Uganda, like the ‘Last King of Scotland’. I am pretty sure we can win some more Oscars. I think the star should be Paul Kagaba, the enstranged Gay Uganda spokes person.

Hey, why Gay Uganda spokes person? I thought Kagaba was ex-gay? Oh, I am pretty sure that he is. So, he is the one spilling the information? Careful, careful. I am warning the Red rug about Kagaba. Of course I know the guy. How much was he given for the story? How much is he being bank rolled for being ex-gay and a happy father now? Careful, careful. Because, I think Kagaba and Oundo have the same thing in common. Figure out what that is, Ssempa!

ha ha ha ha ha!

Of course I am gay, and a lying pervert.

Let us turn to less hilarious news. (I do know, many people believe the things that are written in the red rug as gospel truth….!) But, that stuff is ‘reader beware stuff.’ No more comments. My mouth is zipped.

The Ssempa crusade against homosexuality, a Million person march on Kampala is being announced. Tonight, I might take a chance and peek into Namboole. I bet Ssempa will be there. I bet he will promote the March against Homosexuality. Here is the Monitor article. (And, if the article is moved, I am not putting it anywhere else. I don’t know how to solve the case of the disappearing Monitor articles.) For those who don’t know, there is a huge new year’s day programme in Namboole Stadium. The faithful gather there, and, most likely they will today. Even the president cant help attending, this eve of an election year…! I bet there might be upto 60-80 thousand Ugandans packed in that stadium tonight. I know, it is only a 40 thousand seater, but I am pretty sure I am making a conservative estimate.

Someone pointed out to me that this article on Debunking lies may not be gospel truth. I am pretty sure of the source, but, I am checking….

[Sniff, it will be very highly embarrassing for me to say that Ssempa is lying, and then it turns out I am the one who is mistaken…!] Anyway, I deal in truth. That is my major weapon. And, because of that, I may lose this fight but will win this war. So, just a word of caution. I am so sure that it is right, that I am actually leaving it up. Posted. If it is proven wrong, I will announce it, out to the world, that I lied, and Ssempa didn’t. It will be very sweet victory for him.

And, I hadn’t seen this article putting pressure on MPs to vote for the Bahati Bill. Vote or be voted out. We have become the American Right. But, of course I am mistaken...!

Now, that stuff is out of the way. Good.

Today, the last day of the year, this is what I plan.

To lie down and rest and look up at the skies, especially when they clear in the afternoon. I plan to go out and watch the fireworks. If you hear of me at Namboole, why, I am a famous dude. Imagine me, one in the middle of that mass of humanity. One of sixty thousand. Ugh! Only problem is if they can identify me. That can turn pretty deadly. But don’t you worry. I have the power to turn invisible, at a whisk of my deadly, venomous, homosexual tail. I will fly out over them, and they will be oblivious of me.

Hey all, this year has been eventful. Next year plans to be very interesting. The demonstration against homosexuality is on the 19^th of Jan. (Or 20^th?). I love you all. I really love you all.

Please do enjoy this last day of the year. People here in Uganda cannot wish one a happy new year until one is into the new year. A superstitious thing, that, but that is what society is built on.

So, from me, gug, do wind up this year in peace, in love, in laughter. Welcome the new year with lots of fire and funfare. Be good, (like I would never, ever be…!) And, enjoy the last minutes of the year roll by.

Have a very fantastic roll back of the old year. May it ripen and burst into the flower of a New Year for you.

All the best

gug
UPDATE

PS. Uganda is a very, very unique country. Can you imagine all the sermons on Christmas day being dominated by the vice of Homosexuality? And, this was only in the city.

I reported it here.

But, Box Turtle Bulletin reported it more completely here, with video clips etc. [Shake my head in wonder], I dont know what evil spirit has descended upon my very religious country people. It is simply incredible to believe what is happening. A gay panic sweeping the whole nation. Indeed!